She’s the One

Nancy Colasurdo
4 min readMay 29, 2019

You know what no longer insults me?

“You’re just voting for her because she’s a woman.” Always said with a hint of sneer. Like I’m casting a vote for a crackhead or a tube of lipstick. It’s worth noting that right now we have a feisty young female former bartender making more sense than half of the seasoned law makers in Washington, D.C.

I’m here to share that I have made a personal shift around gender that feels transformative.

Consider these scenarios from my past:

~ Co-worker back in the 1990s upon finding out I didn’t cast a vote for Christie Whitman for governor of New Jersey: “Wow, you won’t even cross party lines to vote for a woman?”

~ Family member in 2017 upon hearing I had my vote for Hoboken mayor narrowed down (in a field of four) to a Democratic male and a Republican female: “Wow, you’d consider a Republican? It’s because it’s a woman, right?”

~ Near constant refrain from Trump supporters in 2016 leading up to the Presidential election: “You’re just voting for Hillary because she’s a woman.”

These made me bristle. Never mind that in many cases they were the ones casting votes based on gender. Have you ever seen scores of men show their mommy issues like they did in 2016? Lordy. And that doesn’t begin to touch the bloc of white women squarely behind the pussy grabber. Isn’t he irresistible when he smirks and tells it like it is? Oh, Donald, tell me what to do.

You might have thought all of that dim-witted hogwash would bring me to the place I’ve now reached with regard to voting, but sadly that wasn’t my tipping point. The abortion bans rippling through our states and the obvious coordinated effort to make that happen have moved me off entrenched stances and my admitted massive fear of patriarchal backlash. I am now unequivocally saying this:

Yes, I will vote for a qualified candidate because she’s female.

I mean that forcefully. I have had a switch in mindset. Enough with trusting our lives to even the most well-meaning men running our government as the majority. Enough. They’re not getting it done.

But let’s bring this to a level of reasoning. Isn’t it asking an awful lot that men understand and embody the full human female…

Nancy Colasurdo

Activist Journalist, Opinion Writer, Author, Life Coach in Greater NYC area. Occasional guest columnist at Six-word bio: Zen chick with a Jersey edge.